wow

it has been almost a full year since my last post. i don't even think any of us even read this anymore. it's almost 3am and i have an 8:20 biology class tomorrow. oh my. i'm stalling. i don't really know what to write about.
hm. how about the fact that i'm a horrible human being. as in, i've done something that's just mean and terrible and so unlike me. i hate it. i've never been like this before. i've never done anything like this before.

regret is a killer. i regret something i didn't, or rather, a decision i made/something i said over fake break, a few weeks ago. i wrote vaguely, without mention of the actual event or people involved, about it in my blog on myspace, but here i suppose i will divulge the full secret. i hope no one finds this and spoils a good time for others involved...you see, a very dear, rather good-looking friend of mine (who i will not name here as that would just be too hard...) invited me to go to a...a ball of sorts. i was a bit startled and suprised when he asked me, and instead of saying what i wanted to, i thought about how weird it would be for me to go back to a high school function as that 'college student.' you know the one. the one that always seems to keep showing up at sporting events, school functions, can be seen in all the local places on the weekends, etc. etc. well, i told myself that if i went to the ball i'd be labled as that girl. even though this was one event, and i do like this boy and we have some fun times together and i don't think it would have felt weird at all (with his friends, going out to eat, partying, even dancing, because it was so chill) so instead of going with a really great, fun, cool guy and doing all these great things, i'll be here at elon that weekend, wishing i'd said what i really wanted to:
"yes."

grooooaaann....i cannot believe the week isn't over yet. i'm mentally exhausted. i'm just so tired. i have 2 interview stories due at the paper tomorrow, and one can't talk until 10am tomorrow and the other won't be back in town until monday...great. it's my fault, i know. i procrastinated until today (thursday) and they are due to Barbara tomorrow (friday). arg. and i just found out that the Red Cross woman who is the Youth Group's advisor is resigning. she has accepted a better position. well, that's fabulous. so now, i, being the group president has to deal with all this...i don't even know if we have a replacement for her yet...so our youth group might be out of commission. *groans again* i don't want to deal with all this...

Nerd, I am...

Just to give all of you a sense of how nerdy I am, I will proceed to tell you what I have done today.
It is now 2:40 pm. I woke up at 7am. Then, I realized that I had only been asleep for 4 hours. This is due to the fact that last night I read an entire book. All 313 pages. And part of Wicked. Did I mention that I hadn't even gone to bed until 1? Given this information, one can conclude that I read 313+ pages in 2 hours. Back to the story...get it? Story?
Right.
I woke up at 7, went back to sleep until 11. I then went downstairs and ate a small bowl of Special K cereal in order to control my proportion. I sat around and watched...well, I don't remember. Then I watched, and enjoyed, the WE channels version of Louisa May Alcott's The Inheiratance. (I don't think that was spelled correctly.) After it was over, I found an episode of Star Trek on Spike. I was thrilled to see that Wesley Crusher, boy genius, was in this particular episode. I sat, alone, on the couch and rambled on to myself about how hot he is and how cool it would be to be a Starship Commander. Actually, a Captain. A Captain gets to run a specific ship. Very cool. Anyway, I ate lunch, which was a bowl of salad and a bowl of maple brown sugar oatmeal.
Sticks to the ribs, ya know.
The Star Trek episode was the one where the USS Enterprise first encounters the Borg. And it's all Que's fault. Thrilling. Now I am typing this entry in my blog.
Wait, mom has just given me the mail. I have just recieved my first issue of National Geographic. Oh, the irony! The cherry on top. I will stop this blog here, with this perfect ending.

Cinderella girl...?

Does anyone else believe in fairy tales? I do. I love to think that I live in my very own Cinderella story. The perfect life with the perfect friends and family. Surrounded by love and happiness. Cheesey, I know. But it's true. Sometimes though, reality checks in. I'm no Cinderella. How could I ever be? What kind of Cinderella watches baseball? What kind of Cinderella wears a t-shirt to bed that is 3 sizes too big? What kind of Cinderella is ashamed to wear bathing suits around perfect strangers because of the hideous scar that runs from neck to navel? What kind of princess drinks Diet Cheerwine straight from the 2 liter bottle while she types to no one about becoming...someone? I do. Am I a Cinderella? Can I be the perfect princess? Do I have a prince charming? Do I...?

Do I care? Yes. Do you? Probably not. Am I vain? No, not really.

Or, will the clock strike midnight?
It's 11:30.
Will I let the clock strike midnight?

Good day...

So, today was basically awesome, to say the least. I went online and found out that I got into Elon. yay me! I was so excited! Although, I thought that my mom would be a little more enthusiastic. Instead, she just asked what day classes start and when my Fellows Scholarship stuff is due...hohum...oh well. I am excited and so were my friends. Sami picked me up when she hugged me. again, yay me! Now sammi's b-day partay is goin' on and I have to "chill wit 'er friends". I am glad we are so close, but I hate to think about what will happen when I go to college...but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

Applications

I finally finished applying to Elon a few days ago, no thanks to some technical difficulties that caused several minutes of nerve-wracking, stomach-twisting, gut-wrenching moments. Basically, every time I tried to submit my payment/application, a "server error" came up saying that the computer couldn't send it for some reason or another. So my mom and I e-mailed the admissions department and copied and pasted the error onto the e-mail. Well, thank God the next day the technical services admissions director (or something like that)-a very nice lady-sent me an email back saying she fixed it and to try again. I did and it worked. She also said that even though it was past the deadline, my application would still be considered under the Early Action deadline because the problem wasn't my fault. Yay!

Now I have to wait until December 20 to know if I got in or not. Ugh...to all the HS grads out there, I can truely say I empathize...one word, my friends...
SENIORITIS!

Meanwhile, life goes on...

For all the WRONG reasons

I know it's been a long time since I last updated. This post is really to bring contentment to those of you who actually care that I have not updated (I don't need to name names. You know who you are.) I wanted to update a few days ago because I had something to say, but I never got the chance and now I don't remember what I wanted to write. It isn't important.

Montreat is Sunday! I cannot wait. Soooo glad Samantha C. is coming-finally. Extremely depressed that Joe, Jordan, and Sarah will not be coming. At least we girls get a house all to ourselves. Ours has air conditioning! I remember last year our house was tiny, puke green, literally smelled like something had died, was filthy, had a teeny shower that rocked and had sides that buckled, and had giant unidentifiable bugs of the creepy persuasion. The year before that we were all in one house with a toilet that leaked through the floor into the light fixture in the kitchen, was a little cramped, and had a floor that was slanted. But both years were fun. Next year is going to be awesome because everyone will be there (at least I hope so).

The only other thing that happened recently was that I was elected President of our Red Cross Youth Group. I don't really want to be President, but no one else was running and I figure that it can't hurt to try. It can't hurt to be able to put it on my college applications, either. I know a lot of people think that is a terrible reason to do stuff like this, but it isn't like that is my only reason. Besides, I really do love this group and the things we do. By the way, please please please contact me if you are interested in joining. 75% of our group are seniors and will all be leaving after this year.

*B-I-I-I-G gasp* Guess what happened! Guess what I found out! This makes me really upset. Not mad, really, but very very sad and anxious. Mrs.(Ms.?) Harbinson chose this year of all years to retire. And appearantly with not much notice. I had signed up for AP English 4 next year. I was counting on having that class to put in my application. Well, my mom gets a call from Brenda Smith who says that I shouldn't buy the AP books yet because they don't know who-if anyone-is going to teach AP next year. Oh, and because only about 4 people signed up for it. Now, if we do still have an AP Eng teacher/class, many people will want to sign up since Harbinson won't be teaching and the class will not be as fun or challenging. It just makes me mad because before, the only people who signed up for her class were people who were serious about learning and were willing to do hard work. Now they will only want to join because it is an easy A in an AP class. Arrg. You don't understand how frustrated this makes me. I really hope that Mrs. Smith or Gargis? can teach it, even if the people that take classes for all the wrong reasons join and spoil it.
Please, if anyone else feels this way, please comment. Even if you are not directly involved in this particular situation.